REAL ANSWERS!
Real Questions, Real Answers: Do you have questions about real life that we can help you to answer with sound Biblical advice? Send us your questions and let's talk it out!
Predestination and Election
Sister Cynthia,
What’s your biblical view on the above subject?
Thanks,
Butch E., Virginia
Hi Brother Butch,
I think of Romans 8:29 which says, “God knew His people in advance and chose them to be like His Son…”
Some people think this means that God has a big long list on a scroll of those He wants to be saved and who he doesn’t want saved, like some VIP list at a nightclub! That is not the nature of God (who is Love) and it doesn’t make any sense! The word of God says that it is not his will that ANY should perish according to 2 Peter 3:8-10. He also said, “Whosoever will, let him come…” and “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son that WHOSOEVER believes in Him shall not perish…” (John 3:16). As Kenneth Copeland says, “Thank God you and I are a 'whosoever'!”
Therefore, it is God’s will for all to be saved. That’s what it means to be “predestined”. It means that He made a plan and set a course for mankind – every man, woman, boy and girl who would ever live to be saved. It was a plan made BEFORE the foundation of the world. In other words, it is pre (before) destined (planned). Now, it doesn’t mean that everyone who is given the chance will accept the invitation to be saved, but the plan of salvation is available to everyone.
Since destiny is a plan, not an immutable, unchangeable outcome, then it is clear that although salvation is a free gift to all, not everyone will choose it. We are creations made with a free will just like God. To say that there are certain people who will be saved no matter what they do or choose is contrary to the gospel message. The Bible says we are to choose this day whom we will serve. We must choose life over death.
Sadly, many will reject the Lord despite proof of His love, but for those who accept Christ, we are the elect – a select, exclusive group. This is not a predetermined outcome, but rather the result of a choice to enter into the covenant plan laid out before the foundation of the world with the Father through the blood of His Son.
Blessings!
Cynthia
To tithe or not to tithe?:
Dear Sister Cynthia,
What does God want us to do when we don't have enough money to bring the tithe and pay all of the bills that are due?
J.P., Virginia
Oh, J.P., I have been there too. What a hard and uncomfortable position to be in. The first thing the enemy plants in our mind is that we should not tithe. "After all, God understands you have needs," he whispers in your ear. Well, the devil is liar!
Sister, I know it is a struggle, but be faithful to God and bring that ten percent to the Lord's house and allow God to multiply it on your behalf! I've seen him do it! He's provided for me when I did not have enough to go around, but I brought my tithe in obedience anyway and said, "God, this is what I have. It's not enough for my bills, but I put it and the whole situation in your hands." God never once let me down. He provided the money that I needed and more.
Friend, when you walk in obedience to Malachi 3 and bring your tithe to the storehouse God will back you up and provide everything that you need! He will honor your faithfulness. Sometimes these times of financial need are tests to see what is really in our hearts. God wants to see if we really trust Him to do and be for us all that He promised in His word. Trust God today with your tithe and watch Him come through for you!
Marriage Issues:
I recently spoke with someone who's marriage was in distress and her husband confessed to having an extra-marital affair with an ex-girlfriend after they began to have problems. Her husband wanted to continue to live in the house and have a relationship with both women until he decided what he wanted to do. The dilemma: Should she agree to let him stay in the home?
My response was a resounding "NO!" There are times when it is appropriate to separate until God does His restorative work in the marriage, especially in cases of infidelity and/or abuse. This husband is completely out of line to think that he should be able to live under the same roof with his wife while continuing a romantic relationship with someone else.
I pray that while he is out there in the world he comes to his senses and returns to his beautiful, loving wife. Perhaps this is just the wake up call that he needs.
What do you think? Have you ever been in a similar situation? What happened?Write to us. We want to hear from you.
Dear Cynthia,
My husband and I are not sure how to handle my stepson's behavior. He is 22 years old and is not making any positive choices in his life. He has no job and is not pursuing education. He lives with his grandmother with no rules or discipline and only contacts his dad (us) when he wants money. He doesn't stick with any job longer than a few weeks before he quits. Worse, he doesn't seem to want a relationship with his father, just financial support. Every time he calls for money, it's always a gotta have it now "emergency". We love him and have given him money, but at what point do we just say no? My husband wants to just cut him off completely due to his disrespect, but I am not sure about that either, as he has juvenile diabetes and needs money for medical too. What should we do?
H.M., Virginia
Dear H.M.,
First of all, I am sorry that you are going through this. It is NOT an easy situation and you are not alone. So many families have an adult child that isn't motivated to improve their lives and comes to his or her parents over and over for money. This can go on for years! Often they will ask for money in a true or alleged dire situation, most of which could have been avoided if they were living responsibly. The cycle continues and the parents grudgingly give the money out of the guilt trip they've been given.
At some point, enough is enough. You will have to decide to use "tough love." I do not suggest cutting him off completely, but you should have a real heart-to-heart with him and tell him that you love him unconditionally. Then tell him that you are not, however, going to enable his irresponsible lifestyle or else he will never grow up. Offer to help him to get a job or go to school and let him know that you are willing to help financially as long as he is trying to better his life. Let your son know how you feel used because he only calls for money.
You have now been open and honest with him. He knows your expectations and the ball is squarely in his court. If he chooses to continue to live a risky lifestyle, then he will be the one who cuts off his financial support by his own actions. He will likely continue to live hand to mouth with no real plan for his future because he thinks you and his dad will always bail him out.
This is so hard, but remember the father in the story of the prodigal son? His son demanded his inheritance and he gave it to him and didn't stop him from leaving. His son went his own way and squandered it all on irresponsible living. It wasn't until he hit rock bottom that he came to his senses, TRULY repented and came home a better man. I pray that your prodigal comes home too.
Wishing you all the best in Christ,
Cynthia
Hi Cynthia,
I am confused about something. Can you tell me if we are supposed to live by the Seven Deadly Sins or the Ten Commandments?
Michael, age 13, Miami, Florida
Dear Michael,
What a great question! Thank you. Living a life that's pleasing to God is not just about not committing the so-called "Seven Deadly Sins" or just following the Ten Commandments. To God sin is sin, whether it's stealing, cheating on a test, or bullying. Yes, there are some sins that have heavier consequences than others. A person who commits murder will not receive the same punishment as someone who lies but as Christians, we are supposed to make our very best effort to live our lives in obedience to all of God's commandments and those in authority over us like our parents, teachers, etc. God has given us His guide for right living in His Word - The Bible. So, whatever we do, we ought to ask ourselves if Jesus would be pleased with our actions.
Bless you!
Cynthia
My classes have begun again. I am trying to start the semester off on the right foot, and would like to begin each study session with scripture. You [Cynthia] had mentioned that you followed that method when you were in law school and how it made such a difference for you. I would love to have that Godly support as I go through this challenge. And knowing that you are a Biblical scholar, I was wondering if you could make some good recommendations for my readings.
Have a Jesus filled day,
Michelle
Dear Michelle,
I am so glad that you are doing this. Putting God’s word first as you begin your academic studies will make an immense difference in your scholastic achievement. It worked for me! I suggest that you log onto KCM.org (Kenneth Copeland Ministries), as sister Gloria Copeland has a brand new devotional out entitled “Blessed Beyond Measure” that would be great for you to use! I am also working on the daily prayer journal for Seasons of Change, but it’s not quite ready yet…it will be soon along with the Seasons of Change Study Guide!
God bless you and happy studying!
Cynthia
